A mother of the bride/groom blog!
It’s always lovely to meet customers who will be going to their daughter or son’s wedding, but my goodness there is certainly a lot of angst behind the scenes!
So what is it about being mother of the bride or groom which is so stressful??
Mostly the mums are anxious that they don’t want to upset anyone. If they are mother of the bride, their beautiful daughter already has her outfit planned, and is keen that her mother looks the part – but she has to find an outfit which will tone or complement the colour scheme she has chosen for her flowers and her bridesmaids or worst case scenario – her outfit is a different colour to the one the mother of the groom is wearing!
What if the colour she thinks her mother should wear doesn’t actually suit her? One of the most common issues we see here is that since the bride is a different generation to her mother, their styles may be completely different, so then you have an unhappy Mum who chooses something she clearly is uncomfortable in wearing. So many times, we see a mother of the bride or groom in our Simply Devine shop looking fabulous in their outfit and hat, for the daughter to say they don’t like what they have chosen.
We always ask our Mothers what colours suit them and what colour is dominant in their wardrobes. Fortunately, most of them realise what we are trying to do and work with us and their loved ones to reach a compromise. We look at hair and skin tones and body shapes to determine what is going to suit because we can say without a shadow of doubt that one size definitely does not suit all.
Petite ladies can get lost under a large hat, while larger ladies need to balance their outfit to suit their shape. If you have beautiful silver hair, you will look too pale in your silver dress, with matching shoes and bag. You don’t have to be dressed in the same colour from head to toe – sometimes contrasting shoes, bag and hat can bring an outfit together. A pashmina casually thrown over one shoulder can also finish off a perfect outfit.
Then there is the issue of blended families, where there are step-parents to consider. We’ve heard tales of woe from step-mothers who want to look good, but don’t want to upstage the bride’s or groom’s mother. For them it’s often about being a little more low-key, but still wanting to look their best.
The same really applies to the mother of the bridegroom. Most seem to accept that the mother of the bride will want to shine and they don’t want to upstage her by going over the top with their outfit – even worse sometimes the mother of the bride doesn’t want to wear a hat while the groom’s mother does! She is just as important as mother of the bride and will appear on the wedding party photographs, though her son is probably not quite so interested in her outfit. If the parents all get on together, then that will take a huge strain off the happy couple, who will have more important things to worry about on their special day.
Weddings are all about the happy couple, so you need to accept the limitations posed by their offspring and compromise. Upsetting the bridal couple on their wedding day can have long-lasting repercussions, and they just want their perfect day, so relax and smile for the cameras!